I've never realized how pointless anything is. Like, where am I going with my life? Nowhere that I know of. Whenever people ask what I want to do, I honestly don't know what to say, I'm not good at anything. I'm completely ineffectual on this planet. Have I ever changed anybody's life? Do I mean anything to anyone? As melodramatic as it sounds I think that it would just be better if I wasn't even here. Nobody ever thinks about me do they? I don't know. Nobody seems to give half a thought towards stupid little Amanda, how I feel about anything. That's probably a good thing though. Its not like I really care about anyone's stupid fucking problems. Maybe thats the problem with me. Although I can't force myself to care, can I? I'm done caring anyway. Every time I put all of my emotions on the line for someone, they just betray me in the end. I seem to be doomed to wander about this earth alone forever. Whats the point? I don't even know if there is one anymore.
I have so much pain inside.
I just want to make it all stop.
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